July 2009 – Page 3 – The only certainty is bad grammar

not a fan of “bing.” yet.

Published: July 18, 2009 / Updated: July 18, 2009 Crystal medium

i try SO hard to stay right there on the cutting edge of technology. i want to be right next to the scissors and the twitters people. for realz.

but alas, i just CANNOT get into Bing, microsoft’s latest search “decision” engine. below are my list of gripes:

1. it makes me think of Chandler Bing from Friends. seriously. and that has nothing to do with search.

2. when you “bing” sevenlayerburritos, my site doesn’t even come up on the first page. LAME. that’s the whole point of having my url. and for that matter, when you bing “crystal lindell” my blog doesn’t come up. that’s crap.

3. it’s too dark. google is so bright and white and clean. bing, while pretty, has way too much clutter on it. i mean, ya, i do like the home page pictures with the cool little search suggestions. but the way the “bing” header is placed in a picture on the top of search results, it just looks like too much. call me picky. fine. whatever.

4. i spent a week two days trying all my searches in bing and google to compare. i even went through the trouble of adding bing to my browser’s search engine bar. all i ended up doing was annoying the crap out of myself and causing twice as much work so i could find out that google is fine. great actually. google is just great.

5. im told i would like the hover feature of the search results, where a section of the web page listed pops up when i scroll over it. but i just think it makes even more clutter. a small synopsis works just dandy for me.

6. bing is supposed to be good for shopping. i searched for wedding invitations on it (NOT for me) and the results were the exact same as google. plus, i never shop online. so ya.

7. im just used to google. and bing doesn’t give me super secret search results i can’t get on google, which makes me think there’s no point in switching.

8. ah man. i don’t want to be the girl resisting change over here. but seriously.

9. also, when i tell people to bing something, they look at me like im crazy. or trying to0 hard to sound cool. when i tell people to google something, i sound totally normal.

in conclusion: i won’t be binging things anytime soon. unless they randomly start posting unlisted numbers. because then i’d be all up on that.

secular prayers

Published: July 16, 2009 / Updated: July 16, 2009 Crystal humor, im cool, long, sh*tty things that happen to me

my friend tom loewy has taken to saying secular prayers for me. whatever the crap that means.

i mean, if you’re going to take the time to close your eyes and think nice thoughts about someone, i’d think it wouldn’t be much harder to add a “Dear God,” at the front end and an “Amen” on the other side just to make sure all the paperwork is in order.

but whatever. i guess he’s just stubborn like that. and don’t get me wrong, it’s not that i don’t appreciate the efforts.

God knows i could use the help right now. i know God knows, because I actually do take the time to address my thoughts to him and then close with a solid “In Jesus name.”

i mean it’s not like im in any sort of trouble. or have anything particularly bad going on.

just the average crap the world throws at you here folks. not enough money, family drama, no love life, self-esteem issues, stress at work.

you know.

oh. and that strange feeling when i think about how i’ll be 26 in a matter of weeks and i still feel like i haven’t gotten my shyte together yet.

so like i said, i’ll take the secular prayers if that’s what he’s offering.

don’t get me wrong, i do try to take the time to see how far i’ve come. to look around and notice that im not, in fact, the same person i was when i was 17.

i have a real job. and live in real home (granted it’s not really MY home). i have a master’s degree, which i still argue is a small measure of success despite the fact that i will be paying it off until i die and then im pretty sure my family will just have to cash in whatever life insurance i have and use it to pay the rest, while they bury me in the newly discounted plots at Burr Oak.

oh. and also i’ve come a long way in realizing what types of guys i DON’T want to date.

that’s can’t be bad right?

for instance, remember that guy i wrote the letter to in high school? where i used statistics to deter his advances. well, i looked him on facebook.

and friended him.

people i was CURIOUS and his profile was private, what was i supposed to do? so just lay off.

anywho, he actually called me. on wednesday. at 6:17 a.m.

to say hello.

AT 6:17 AM!

he wanted to tell me that he was happy i was friends with him on facebook now. im not going to sugar coat this guys, i was kind of a biotch about the whole thing seeing as how IT WAS 6:17 IN THE MORNING AND THERE WAS NO APPARENT EMERGENCY, NEWS OR OTHERWISE! and i hung up after explaining that maybe he could call me after say 9 AM!

see. see how far i’ve come.

because we all know that when i was 17, i would have found a way to see him right then. i would have been so happy that a boy was giving me attention that i would have stolen the keys to my dad’s van and driven out to meet him that very morning.

alas, though, i still have a ways to go. i still have a lot of life’s things to get in order and figure out.

so like i’ve been saying, i’ll take whatever prayers i can get. even those of a secular nature.

a pretty blank day

July 15, 2009 Crystal daily photo, humor, medium

don’t get me wrong, some shyte happened today and whatnot, it’s just that none is the kind of thing i can post here.

i mean there was the thing with that one guy and then the other thing with the other guy.

oh! oh!

AND that one thing with that one girl.

sigh.

ya. can’t write about any of that here.

i swear, it’s almost enough to make me wish that i didn’t go around telling people about my blog all the time.

ha.

ya right. like THAT’S ever going to happen.

in other news, i did change my earrings today for the first time since getting them pierced. i went with a lovely little blue flower that i got as part of a three-pack on sale for $2.65.

seriously.

im cheap like that.

here’s a pic in case you’re sitting there on the very edge of your seat cushion wanting to know what they look like (and yes, i really am that pale):