My car keeps stalling at stoplights.
Like, at first, it would do it like once a week or whatever, and I would just start it back up, no big deal.
But then, it started happening like once a day. And I was like, ‘Hmm, this is kind of annoying, but whateves.’
Now though, it’s pretty much every time I go under 5 mph. Which, you know, is kind of every 45 seconds or so out here in the suburbs.
To be honest, though, even that didn’t really bother me until I had to drive one of my youth students to church, and then starting the car back up at every intersection got kind of embarrassing.
I know, I know. I should take it to a mechanic.
But dudes, I just did that and it cost me like a bazillion dollars, and I’m still paying it off $300 a month at a time, and I won’t finish until March, so I’m trying to hold off on getting anything else fixed until I get that paid off.
And we all know that I automatically assume that if I take my car to a mechanic he/she will find a way to charge me $4,000 to fix whatever the heck is wrong with it. So instead, I’m just going to pretend that this keeps happening because it’s cold outside, and that it — like many of my problems — will go away when summer comes back.
Either that, or by then I’ll have saved up enough for a new car.
OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! I CANNOT THINK ABOUT ANYTHING AT ALL EVER EXCEPT FOR SUNDAY AT 3 P.M. RIGHT NOW!!
Can you BELIEVE the BEARS are playing the PACKERS in the PLAYOFFS????
As my brother Steve so elegantly said, “This is going to be epic.”
Dudes, whomever wins this game will have the bragging rights to last through the next 50 or 60 decades.
Whenever anyone is all, ‘Ha, my team beat yours,’ The winner of this game will forever be able to counter with, ‘Ya, but we won that playoff game back in 2011 and you didn’t. The end.”
I’m not going to lie, I’m pretty scared.
I mean, you know, it’s not like I don’t totally believe the Bears can win. (Come on, this game is in OUR HOUSE. And the Bears have been passing and then catching the ball on a pretty regular basis AND we have Robbie Gould). But, you know, there’s just so much on the line.
Plus, all the commentators are spending all their stupid free time being all, ‘Aaron Rodgers is awesome. Aaron Rodgers is the greatest quarterback ever. Aaron Rodgers will you go on a date with me?’
Blah and throw up.
For the record, he is not a god. And green and yellow make an ugly color combination. So there.
In conclusion, I really, really, really hope with all my heart that we (and by “we” I mean, “The Bears”) win this epic, colossal, monster, monumental, very, very, very, very important game!
I feel less stressed.
And it’s pretty freaking awesome.
I am finally financially stable for the first time in my entire life. Seriously. My ENTIRE. LIFE.
I don’t have to worry about spending $3 on food the day before I get paid. I don’t have to drive with my fuel light on for long stretches of time. If someone asks me to go to dinner at Applebee’s, I don’t have to make myself sick worrying about whether or not that someone will pay for me or not. And, I can buy chap stick and toliet paper when I need them.
It’s all so great.
Also, I feel really happy with how I look. I feel comfortable with my body. For real. And it took me a long, long time to get here. But being here makes me smile.
I also love both my jobs.
I’m not going to lie, I went through some grief leaving behind daily newspapers. But it didn’t take me long to fall in love with an environment where my co-workers don’t constantly look like they’ve been hit in the back of a head with a hammer because they’re so stressed. Or where I work 8:30 a.m. to 4:15 p.m. Monday through Friday. (Yes those are my real hours). (It’s all right to be jealous). Or where we get a little time to REFLECT on our product without constantly having to put out the daily news.
Plus, I really do get as many candy samples as you’d think.
And I can’t even explain how great my job as a youth director is. Just imagine rainbows mixed with love and peace and fantastic and then add in hope and faith and you might kind of, sort of, start to understand.
So basically, in conclusion, life is pretty sweet right now. And I can really, truly appreciate it all because I went through crap and a half to get here.