I believe

I believe in God.

I believe in prayer.

I believe that when you kill an animal, it suffers. (Even if it tastes like bacon later).

I believe in Google Voice.

I believe in spell check and word counts and putting the period after the parenthesis.

I believe that it is fantabulous to create words.

I believe in journalism. (I don’t believe in the business model).

I believe in vitamins and hand sanitizer and Kleenex with lotion.

I believe in universal health care and a single-payer system.

I believe the world will not end in 2012.

I believe in going to church. (I don’t believe in a perfect church, but I don’t believe that’s the point).

I believe that when you twist a straw wrapper in half and the knot pulls through, someone you love is thinking about you.

I believe in life on other planets. (And I believe that to not, is narcissistic).

I believe tithing can be your money or your time.

I believe that people can change. (But I don’t believe it happens very often).

I believe in flossing daily and brushing your teeth at least twice a day.

I believe in giving someone the benefit of the doubt when they ask you for $5 on a street corner.

I believe in giving everyone the benefit of the doubt at least once.

I believe in beeswax for lip balm and that shaving cream really is better than plain soap for shaving.

I believe in wearing jeans to work as often as possible.

I believe in TIME magazine.

I believe that football and Great America have done just as much to bond my family as any of the dozens of tragedies we’ve endured, but with a much sweeter process.

I believe you can drive on spare tire for at least 300 miles before you really need to get it replaced.

I believe that oil change guidelines aren’t set in stone.

I believe in keeping  jumper cables in your car.

I believe that I could live on Taco Bell.

I believe that getting my hair dyed and my eyebrows waxed are good investments.

I believe that 12 is young, and 30 is old.

I believe in the possibility that my beliefs will change.

I believe everyone should.

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Hey there!

OMG, if you’re not a bears fan, I’m sorry but!

I don’t think they’re going to fire Lovie!

My friend Jeff at work, who always knows everything about sports like a psychic or something, explained it all to me, and he doesn’t think they’re going to fire him because of the stupid $11 million they’d have to pay him and really the team needs to spend that on a new offensive line, and Jeff was totally right about Rio getting the Olympics, so ya.

Boo.

I’m so mad at him.

Lovie. Not Jeff.

It’s going to be so hard to trust him next year after the mess he led our team into this year.

“The 2009 Bears! Hey, at least we beat the Vikings that one time.”

Moving on, I have no pants.

Well, I have like one pair of black pants, but really, even though I bought them like a month ago – they’re too big. And I can’t even wear heels with them to make them look less “too big” because of my stupid ankle.

I used to just wear dark jeans to work hoping nobody would notice, but now umm, I can’t, and it is too darn cold to wear a skirt, so I have to get more pants. Back in the day (July) I thought shopping was lame because nothing ever fit me right, but now, I fit in appropriate sizes and let me tell you – shopping is still really freaking hard.

Seriously.

I should be out getting pants right now. I’m not.

And really, I need to just suck it up and buy the pants that are are size too small, but kind of fit and trust that I’ll eventually lose another 8 pounds (as had been my track record for the last five months) and then I will have pants that fit for a long time, but I’m scared I’ll jinx myself and never lose the next 8 pounds.

Oh, and also, why does nobody sell jewelry boxes?

I really need one because I have a bunch of earrings now and woah, do those things randomly get lost a lot. But I cannot find one anywhere and now I’m  going to have to go to Claire’s and it might have to be neon pink.

Oh and guess what?! My friend Krista has been moving her WordPress.com blog over to her own domain and she got this photo widget thing and then she told ME about it. And now I can send pictures to my blog with a TEXT MESSAGE!! YAY! (Look to your right under ‘Can you see me now.’).

I predict that this will mean many fun times for us. Also, if you read me on RSS, you should click on my actual site and look at my pictures. 🙂

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My ankle is jacked

The Bears apparently still suck.

Crazy huh?

Stupid Packers.

It took the cheeseheads 1 minute and 43 seconds to score, which wouldn’t be so bad if say, they had started with the ball.

Lame.

Moving on.

My ankle is JACKED.

I was at Jazzercise Saturday morning, all ‘skip-ball-change HOP! skip-ball-change HOP! skip-ball-change HOP! skip-ball-change HOLY BANANA COVERED SNOW FROM PIRATES! WHAT THE GROUND HOG DAY JUST HAPPENED?????!!!!!’

I pretty much touched the arch of my foot to my ankle bone and then landed on it.

Just writing that hurts.

It kinda looks like someone painted it purple, blue and puffy.

And before you go all “DID YOU SEE A DOCTOR” on me, A. I am still (STILL) paying off my surgery from a year ago. and B. I didn’t hear the infamous “crack” sound you hear so much about when bones break, so I’m banking on it just being sprained, in which case, I can implement RICE (rest, ice, compress, elevate) by my own self, thank you very much.

I will say that going to the bathroom has turned into a medal-worthy project involving mostly unused arm muscles and trusting a wall-mounted toilet paper holder to bear more weight than the manufacturer recommends.

Luckily, my family is so freaking awesome that as soon as I called my mom with tears in my eyes, she gathered up my sister, my niece, my grandma, a pair of crutches and some taco bell and they all came over.

Thank God.

Seriously.

Without them I’d be avoiding water so as cancel out unnecessary ladies’ room trips, living on peanut butter from the jar (I don’t really grocery shop), and using lukewarm water to ice my ankle because getting fresh ice would suck too much.  Plus, I’m pretty sure my roommate doesn’t want to help me into shower – making me (much appreciated) eggs with cheese and soy chik’n strips was more her limit.

Now excuse while I take 3 advil, watch the Bears lose, and contemplate how exactly I will drive with my left foot tomorrow.

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