Too personal for the internet.
at first i thought it was just old people. “stupid silly old people” i thought to myself. “they’re just so far behind in technology”
but, alas, i’ve come to find that about 85 percent of my blog readers have no freaking clue what twitter is, and a good portion of them are umm, young.
so, let me explain.
Read more “ok. fine. let’s talk about what twitter is and why i like it.”
all right folks. calm down. if this is your first experience with the word vegan, step away from the CNN Web site.
slowly :: slowly ::
ok. there. now we can have an intelligent conversation about the following headline, which has been running on the CNN.com
Vegan on FBI’s ‘Most Wanted Terrorists’ list
really? REALLY? what the crap?
one my twitter follows, foodeater, alerted me to the situation, with a tweet, and i immediately alerted my roommate with comments such as “I HATE CNN,” “CNN SUCKS!” and “WHY ARE PEOPLE SO STUPID?!”
here’s the issue: why do they have to identify the crazy person by his vegan status? if it were a story about a man burning down abortion clinics in the name of all things holy, would the headline have read “Christian on FBI’s ‘Most Wanted Terrorists’ list?” um no. it would not. and if it did, craploads of christians would undoubtedly raise their hands, point to CNN and ask, “what the frick?”
really though, this doesn’t make mad, so much as it makes me distressed. i spend all my hours trying to be cool and awesome and explaing to anyone who asks that veganism is not crazy, but actually just cool and awesome like myself. and that really, within the next few decades it may well move up a few notches on the “normal” scale.
but then, CNN comes along and is all: VEGAN = TERRORIST. and then millions of people around the interweb get the idea in their head that anyone crazy enough to “eat no meat or any other food containing animal products” will probably also be crazy enough to go around bombing things. and WAM!, vegan shoots way down to the bottom of the “normal” scale.
so yes, it makes me sad.
it’s not all bad news though. today i saw a vegan steak-like product at Whole Foods, so maybe that will convince a few more people that the whole plant-based diet is doable. what’s that? it doesn’t actually taste like steak? oh. ok. well, have you tried the fake chicken? because that stuff rocks!
i truly accredit my latest success with veganism to vitamins.
you say placebo, i say wonder drug.
my grandma lindell would be so proud. she was addicted to vitamins the way 20-somethings are addicted to twitter. I have memories of her popping like 15 a day. or maybe it was 50. who could tell?
and she was one of those addicts who was always trying to push her latest product. she’d order them for me and my brothers when I was little and then she would ship us the children’s chewables shaped like a stars from geneseo, il because she thought they were THAT important and awesome. Now that’s passed on, I’m pretty sure 85 percent of my immediate family has gotten 65 percent less healthy.
so, maybe it’s a sign that I’ve grown up to be like her, or maybe it’s a sign that I’ve finally been brainwashed by the health stores like her, but i’ve become pretty dependent on my daily caplets. Ironically it’s because of the one trait i possess that never failed to make her cringe – the lack of animal in my diet – that prompted the need for them in the first place. granted, things have gotten a little more extreme since she graced the earth, what with my new-found lack of milk, cheese and eggs. EGGS!! i hear her scream from heaven. BUT WHAT WILL YOU EAT FOR BREAKFAST NOWWWW!!!???!?!
sigh.
i miss her.
amway, i know you’re dying to find out what i could possibly be popping that makes me THIS COOL. the answer? VegLife Vegan Iron vitamins that I bought at Whole Foods a few months ago. Aside from their namesake Iron, they also have B-12. the two things every vegan needs. and im telling you, they freaking work. (see: dizzy, lack of).
but it wasn’t a bottomless jar, and because a. i didn’t feel like driving 67 miles to the nearest whole foods and b. i like instant gratification and therefore avoid ordering online, I set out to find new vitamins wednesday at my local GNC.
and there they were. the store’s brand of vegetarian vitamins.
can i get a woot! woot!
these things have 100 percent of EVERYTHING! iron. check. b-2. check. b-12. check. zinc. check.
they’re so potent that they make my pee turn bright yellow, which I can only assume is a sign of my new super healthy-ness.
now excuse me while i save the world with my new-found b-complex powers.
all it a day’s work for us vitamin takers. all. in. a. day’s. work.
UPDATE: I hope SCVegan is joking in my comments section, but just in case, you really don’t get the reference: