Win, lose, love.

So I’m seriously hoping that the Occupy Wall Street protesters will convince everyone to forgive student loan debt.

No. For real.

They seem like a bunch of people with student loan debt, and seeing as how it would stimulate the economy if me and everyone else didn’t have to shovel $310 to the federal government every month just to keep up with interest, I think the idea is totally winning.

And speaking of winning, I finally got some basic cable in my crib. (Crib is cool still, right?). I also got internet. Good news: Basic cable comes with free OnDemand! Holla! History Channel’s Ancient Alien, here I come. Bad news: The very most basic cable and internet package possible still is costing me $55 a month. Losing.

Speaking of losing, I got the flu shot this week at work, and then promptly got a (very) mild version of the flu.

I had never got the shot before, but I have to say — not sure it’s worth it. I got a slight fever, and the chills and that achy feeling where it hurts when air touches your skin. And I slept about 24 hours over a 36-hour period. True story.

Everyone tells me that it’s better than the real flu, which I believe. It’s just that I feel I like gambled with my body. I feel like getting the shot is only worth it if you know for 100 percent that you’re going to get the flu. Which I don’t.

I mean, ya, whatever, I was really excited when my company gave me the shot for free. I felt like it was a neat perk at my job and that the higher ups really do care about me. And my co-workers said that I needed it because I travel all the time to and from candy conferences and whatnot.

But I’m still undecided about getting it next year, seeing as how it kicked the crap out of me.

And speaking of undecided, I’m feeling really all right about being single these days.

I used to worry about my biological clock and whatever, but I have since come up with a back-up plan if I don’t get knocked up in time. Say it with me. A-dopt-ion.

Problem solved.

And, as my little sister said, it could be worse. I could be trying to find my second husband.

True that. Girl. True. That.

And speaking of my little sister, she sprained her ankle for, seriously, the fourth time since February.  I too am cursed with weak ankles (see: falling off a side walk, falling in a Target parking lot, falling in Jazzercise, etc.). It sucks.

I feel really bad for her. And I just wanted to take this chance to tell her: I’m praying for you. I hope you get better soon. And I love you so much I can’t even explain it.

And, well, speaking of love, umm, God.

I had a sort of epiphany recently about the big guy.

I used to think that if he didn’t answer my prayers exactly, and didn’t make everything better all the time, then He either didn’t exist or that He was a jerk or that I couldn’t count on Him.

It sounds so silly to take things into your own hands, but it often feels so much easier.

But the more I’ve gotten to know Him, the more I understand how to connect with Him. And I’ve learned to feel Him, and rely on Him. And well, if there’s just one thing I wish I could explain adequately to people it’s that just because He doesn’t respond to prayers like they’re a wishes and He’s a genie, doesn’t mean He doesn’t care or that’s He’s not there.

Also, that prayer works. It’s just almost never in the way you expect.

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Dear 14-year-old Crystal

Dear 14-year-old Crystal,

You’re going to turn out pretty cool. Seriously. At 28, your footing is steady and you’ve got a lot of things figured out.

You’ve got TWO great jobs, even though the economy totally tanked. (Oh. Ya. The economy falls off a cliff, but no worries. You’ve got enough brains and passion to pull through). You’re a writer for a candy magazine and you also lead a church youth group. Pretty fun stuff.

You’ve got a walk-in closet.  What the what?! Ya. It’s pretty awesome.

I mean, you know, your twenties aren’t all cake and pie, but you do figure a lot of things out.

Like which their/there/they’re to use when. And how to buy the perfect pair of skinny jeans (Ya, those come back in style). And that you really just look best with blond hair and bangs. (Seriously. Just stick with it).

Of course, you’ve also learned some more umm, important foundational things. Like about God and stuff. (I.E. He’s real).

I know that one of the things they always focus on in church is that THOU SHALL NOT HAVE SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE!! OR THOU WILL DIE AND GET PREGNANT AND BE WHORE!! And, ya, it’s good advice not to have sex, but not for those reasons. You should wait because you don’t need to do any of that stuff to feel love. I promise. You are already loved.

Think about that for a second. It’s true. Promise.

Also, with the God stuff.  It’s not all about the rules and the regulations and the thou shall not’s. Because, while that’s all important, I promise it will all fall into place if you just focus on loving Christ. Because, when you love Him, you’ll be filled with the fruits of the spirit and suddenly you’ll just naturally choose to listen to Christian music and read the Bible all the time and pray and live a holy life. You’ll do it because God’s your friend and it’s fun to connect with a friend.

Of, course, you won’t always succeed with that. And I want you to know something really important — it’s all right to fail. And I don’t mean in the “you learned something from this so everything is cool” sort of way. But in the “you just totally made the worst string of decisions ever in your life and everything feels like it’s going to crash down on you as punishment” sort of way. Because it happens to all of us, and because I know that sometimes, when that happens, you start to feel like life is hopeless. It’s not. There is always hope — for you and the world. And if you pray and ask for forgiveness, all will be well and peace will find you again.

Also, (and this is important), don’t fight with Bob when he calls you randomly in your dorm room that one time in the beginning of your junior year in college. Just talk with him, tell him how much you care about him, and soak up every ounce of conversation possible. Please.

I know you’re worried about the future, because you just worry about things. But I want you to know that all is well here in 2011 and you really do turn out pretty cool.

Faith+Hope+Love,

Me.

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WWF (No, not THAT F)

I’m biologically addicted to Words With Friends. I play it first thing in the morning, before I even pee.

Oh heck. I even play it WHILE I pee.

Shut up. You do it to.

I also play when I eat, I play when I should be studying the Bible, I play right before I go to bed, and then I dream in letter tiles.

Q.

I.

S.

Triple word score.

Sigh.

It’s so fun.

For those who do not have a Facebook and/or smartphone IV connected to their arms, the game basically is Scrabble for the future. You can play people you know or random strangers, and you each take turns spelling words for points. The games can last days depending on whether or not your WWF playing schedules mesh up and whether or not you want to take some time to figure out exactly how to play your Z on a triple word score.

I love you triple word score.

Today, WWF told me I’ve officially won 10 games.

The secret is two letter words people. Ha. Jo. Za. Qi. Those are words that win games.

Also, I want to take this moment to express a disclaimer: Just because I’m a “writer” doesn’t mean I have some sort of supernatural spelling skills. Writing, and spelling are VERY different talents. Writing is comprehensive, where as spelling is memorization. True story: I got a D in spelling fourth grade and the teacher said it was only because she liked me and didn’t want me to fail. So if everyone could stop telling the whole world how awesome they are every time you beat the journalist, that’d be awesome.

And anyway, I’m totally getting better at this game everyday, so I’ll probably crush you next round. Just sayin’

Just don’t get too anxious when I don’t play a word right away. I’ve got 15 games going and girl’s gotta shower at least once a day.

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