The problem with gel nails is that you can’t get the dang things off.
That, and the fact they can cost $40.
I mean, sure, it’s awesome that they don’t chip and they dry instantly, but after about two weeks, you spend 10 days picking at them trying to get the suckers off, only to find out that your real nails are more damaged than a 15-passenger van after a mission trip.
I could be reasonable about the whole thing and go to a nail salon and ask them to take them off or something I guess, but I’m scared they’ll try to talk me into getting another set and then I’ll feel bad and I’ll want to say no because I can’t afford it, but there will be a 50% chance I’ll say yes, so instead, I just pick at them.
For 10 days.
And I look like I lack basic hygiene abilities.
I got the nails for April’s wedding.
I was the maid of honor, so I figured, if there’s ever a time for gel nails it’s the day you’re the maid of honor in your best friend’s wedding.
Between that and fake eyelashes, there’s 75% chance that I looked better on her special day than I will for my own.
Of course, that’s assuming I’ll have my own.
I’d like to think special days don’t have to be weddings though. I’d like to think that I’ve already had a handful of really special days.
Like the day I got my master’s Degree. Or the day my sister had to do a project about someone she admires and she did the project about me, and even drew a portrait of my face, complete with the part in my bangs that always happens by the end of the day even thought I want my bangs to go straight across.
Or the day I got a car with heated seats and automatic start.
Or the day I experienced my first youth mission trip foot washing ceremony and I prayed over 19 kids and cried for three hours straight because the power of the holy spirit was that overwhelming. Or the first day of the first Sweets and Snacks Expo I ever covered, where I literally walked across a threshold into Candy Land, Illinois.
Or the day I stood at the top of a mountain and looked down over Bogota, Colombia, the most beautiful city in the world.
Ya, I’d like to think that I’ve had a couple special days here and there.
On exactly none of those days though, was I wearing fake eyelashes and gel nails, so I’m not really sure if they count.
I’d like to think they do though. That maybe, for me, it will be completely all right if I’m unwed forever.
And if a husband happens to come along, I can tell him all about the heated seats and the foot washing and Bogota, while I sheepishly hide my half-picked gel nails.