seriously, vegan food doesn’t suck

holy freaking crap. i just tried veganaise today and it is so d@mn good.

seriously.

it’s mayo for vegans and i had it on toasted organic bread with tofurky and tomatoes. in conclusion, i was pretty much in heaven.

tofurky is so good i can eat it alone.

but add all those other things to it and i can suddenly live without sex. without chocolate. without johnny depp. without money. i can suddenly live without dairy, eggs and meat.

i had only ever tried generic brands of soy turkey and vegan mayo before and let me just say — go name-brand foods!

seriously.

sometimes when i remeber im a vegan i freak out because i think about all the stuff i can’t eat (mozzarella. omelets. m&m’s. kraft cheese and macaroni. cream of broccoli soup) but then, i eat something a.maz.ing like veganaise.

and i think ‘wow! what will they come up with next? vegan snicker’s bars?’

*sigh* if only.

if.

only.  

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seriously, vegan food doesn’t suck

holy freaking crap. i just tried veganaise today and it is so d@mn good.

seriously.

it’s mayo for vegans and i had it on toasted organic bread with tofurky and tomatoes. in conclusion, i was pretty much in heaven.

tofurky is so good i can eat it alone.

but add all those other things to it and i can suddenly live without sex. without chocolate. without johnny depp. without money. i can suddenly live without dairy, eggs and meat.

i had only ever tried generic brands of soy turkey and vegan mayo before and let me just say — go name-brand foods!

seriously.

sometimes when i remeber im a vegan i freak out because i think about all the stuff i can’t eat (mozzarella. omelets. m&m’s. kraft cheese and macaroni. cream of broccoli soup) but then, i eat something a.maz.ing like veganaise.

and i think ‘wow! what will they come up with next? vegan snicker’s bars?’

*sigh* if only.

if.

only.  

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funny girls

The other day I was hanging out with my super cool friend from Springfield (hi stephanie!).

I seriously had not seen her in like for. eva.

and as we were driving along in the car she was TOTALLY laughing at every. freaking. joke. i made.

i was thinking it’s because im so funny.

but then.

i noticed that nobody else in the car was laughing.

at any of my jokes.

so i was all “I’m glad stephanie thinks im funny,” and in my head i was thinking “THAT’S why we’re so close.”

but.

then she was all “oh, sometimes I just give you a sympathy laugh.”

frick.

i guess that’s because we’re friends on an even deeper level than i thought — i mean she obviously has my back.

also, im thinking it’s because i have a dry wit, and although other people find me HILARIOUS, they don’t feel the NEED to laugh out loud.

right?

right? 

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