medium – Page 99 – The only certainty is bad grammar

stir me some crazy

February 15, 2008 Crystal medium

so, i’ve lived in wisconsin long enough to know that when we get our typical weekly blizzard it’s best to just stay home that day. and seeing as how i didn’t have to work, i woke up this morning, looked out my window, saw said weekly blizzard and went right back to bed.

and normally, i can convince myself that i actually have TWO reasons to stay home — one being the blizzard and two being a lack of money to do anything fun with anyway. but because i decided to pay my rent AND my car insurance on my next check (which will leave me approximately $20) i have some extra money. and you know me and money. i wear pockets, it burns holes. and i have SO MANY things i can buy for my apartment, because all i have right now is a bed and a magazine rack.

but NO, i had to keep reminding myself ALL DAY that i should just avoid driving in this stupid blizzard. and normally i would just ignore my advice, but (candidate x) is coming to town tomorrow, and knowing my luck i’d go get myself killed driving in this weather and i wouldn’t get to cover (candidate x). so i just stayed home. all. freaking. day. and played online. and bothered the boy i like on the phone with lame conversation. and watched a REALLY LONG movie. and did the dishes. and the laundry. and blogged. and that has brought me to about 8 p.m. but seeing as how im not a seven-year-old i don’t want to go to bed yet. and the snow has stopped.

NO! what am i thinking. the roads probably aren’t safe. and i really don’t want to die before tomorrow. i NEED to just stay put. ughhh. it’s been snowing for almost FOUR MONTHS. i can’t freaking take it anymore. somebody PLEASE find me a job south of Kentucky. please. so i can go out during the day like a normal person again. please.

it starts at 8

February 10, 2008 Crystal medium

my sister (who’s all of EIGHT) and i went shopping for jeans for her this weekend — which, you know, SHOULD be a fun bonding experience. but instead, we just realized that jean-making companies must measure fabric on blow-up dolls because NOTHING FREAKING FITS! they are either too long, or too tight, or too short or they bunch in the back and show her unmentionables and NO, we are NOT going to ger her $17.99 jc Penny jeans tailored for $50. we just aren’t.

and, you should know, that my EIGHT year-old sister already has encountered vanity sizing in her clothing section. she’s one size, but for some reason her JEANS range in size from 12-16. hmm. THAT seems weird. are little-kid clothing manufactures trying to sell smaller sizes in bigger cuts to make kids feel skinny or are they just too stupid to make things the right size?

and i thought, that maybe it was because she’s half black and half white and maybe clothing manufactures just didn’t know about her body shape. but I’ve since talked to some moms and no matter what kind of kid they have (black, white, both, neither), they all complain that jean shopping sucks.

and the thing is, jean shopping sucks for me too. but, I’m too scared my little sister that. because that means she’ll NEVER be able to find jeans that fit. I’m thinking if Hillary Clinton addressed THIS issue in her campaign, she’d have the nomination sown up by now. pun intended.

whatcha doing tonight? me? oh, I’m watching cnn and msnbc with a little fox

February 6, 2008 Crystal medium

i’ve kind of been waiting for this day for a year. yes. a year. true story. “why?” becuase it’s super tuesday. duh.

I’m not going to pretend I don’t get high off politics just because i’m a reporter and stupid people think reporters are supposed to be completely unbias and therefore uninterested in politics. HELLO! it’s BECAUSE i get high off politics that I went into reporting. I get paid to follow this stuff. and then, I get to write about it. and i kind of like writing. kind of. and they pay me to do that too (well, pay is a lose term, but they give me a little bit of money).

I, of course support (candidate x) and I’m really hoping (candidate x) will do well tonight (and by do well, I mean win every state).

So, tonight, all night, you’ll be able to find me sitting on my air mattress (or as i call it, my couch) with my little black end table full of pretzels, french onion dip, dasani water, ritz crackers and ramon noodles.

I’ll probably watch cnn a bunch (they ARE the most trusted name in news, or so they’ve told me), but when they go to commercial i won’t hesitate to go to msnbc. and when BOTH of those are at commercial I’ll suck it up and switch my tv to fox news. all the while, i’ll be getting my political txt updates and reading live blogging* on time.com. I’m not sure if that’s enough new sources.

the polls are starting to close now, so umm, I kind of need to direct my attention elsewhere. go (candidate x)! go. go.

*unrelated note, I think it’s downright hilarious that my blog** spell check doesn’t recognize the word blogging. hilarious. i’m even almost laughing.

**related to the unrelated note: oh, and it doesn’t recognize the word blog either. of course.