i don’t have children, so instead we shall all wish my blog a happy brithday

i have about 12 minutes left before my blog’s birthday officially ends, but people, i had to work all freaking day. what do you want from me?

so here it is. it’s been one year since my first post. and i have to say, i really have grown to love this thing like a person. i think about it all day with a loving smile, and wonder what i’ll get to do to it next when i get back to my precious laptop and search “wordpress plugins” in an effort to track down amazing new features. i buy it gifts, like business cards and its own url. i even find myself reading it like i don’t write the posts.

and sometimes, when i start to forget how wonderful the interweb and mr. wordpress are, magic steps in to remind me. like today, when two of my co-workers were all “your blog is hilarious. i even read one of the entries out loud to my friends” and i was all “really? im funny? well, that’s always been my goal, but i secretly worry that im failing everytime i write a post.”

to all my readers, thank you.

to all my readers who tell their friends and family to read me, super duper thank you

and to all the people who send me spam, fudge off.

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re: comments

ok. ok. ok. I KNOW. I pretty much NEVER reply to comments left on my site. I’m sorry. I’m a bad person. The thing is, I LOVE reading the comments. And I usually get so excited when I get a comment that i tell anyone who’s with me about it. I just never take the time to reply to them.

the worst part is, when I leave a comment on someone else’s site, I click on it about 150 times waiting to see if the blog author will acknowledge my existence. and when they do! holy! mollee! Do I get ex.ci.ted.

so I’d like to take this opportunity to say: I’m going to make more of an effort. Actually, since I’m mentioning it, that should be new year’s resolution. ya. THAT will be my new year’s resolution. I pledge to respond more often in the comment section of this blog.

Also, I’d like to formally apologize for not transferring over my blogroll from my old site. It just seems like such a tedious process, and I haven’t had the patience to do it. However, I am now officially making this part b of my new year’s resolution. so yes, by this time next year (at the latest), I will have a full blog roll again.

cross my heart and pinky swear.

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so yes, i’m freaking out

So i went to the doctor today and i’ll go ahead and give ya’ll the lede — I have gallstones.

four of them.

i got my little ultrasound this morning and as i was thinking that the jelly wasn’t as cold as everyone says it is while i wiped it off my stomach, the technician was all “the doctor WILL call you monday”

me: wait. how do you know? is something wrong? is something WRONG?!

her: well i’m not supposed to “technically” read the slides, but see your gall bladder here. well, it’s supposed to be all black.

pause.

ALL BLACK.

see how it’s not ALL black.

me: frick.

her: ya, there are four gallstones in there. but on the brightside, they seem to line up perfectly.

me: really? that’s the best you’ve got for a “brightside?”

her: well, ya. the doctor will call you monday. i’d stay away from spicy and greasy foods till then.

me: umm. ok. gee. thanks.

me to my mom like five seconds later: holy crap. i KNEW something was ACTUALLY wrong with me. i KNEW it.

oh. frick. something is ACTUALLY wrong with me!! AND i have to wait till MONDAY to find out what happens next.

since then, ive discovered way too much information online about gall stones for own good.

the upside is, i guess they won’t have to stick a camera down my throat and into my stomach.

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