The only certainty is bad grammar – Page 115 – Too personal for the internet.

a sad day.

June 13, 2009 Crystal medium

my friend died.

his name was Dionate. and today was his funeral.

we grew up together.

he was my next-door neighbor.

he was only 23.

and someone stabbed him to death last week.

today was his funeral.

a funeral for a 23-year-old.

23.

and he wasn’t in a gang. or on drugs. or shooting people.

he wasn’t anything bad.

he was my friend.

and last weekend he was in the wrong place at the wrong time.

he was at a party.

and now he dead.

forever.

the funeral was very sad.

and everyone from my childhood was there.

and they were all crying.

a lot.

and so was I.

i hugged his brothers.

and walked up to the casket.

i said good bye.

and cried.

a man sang amazing grace.

and Dionate’s girlfriend read a letter to him.

she cried the most.

and then they closed the casket.

why did this happen?

why did my friend die?

he was only 23.

23.

im feeling pretty, umm, what’s the word? oh. ya. “blah.”

Published: June 11, 2009 / Updated: June 12, 2009 Crystal im cool, sh*tty things that happen to me

i miss south dakota. and the boy. im not going to pretend i just forgot about him because im 12 hours away. i didn’t. i miss him.

and i gained 4 pounds in the last two weeks. FOUR FREAKING POUNDS! wtf? all day, every day i think about how i want to lose 10 14 pounds. is that too much to ask? no. no it is not. except for the fact that my body HATES ME!

also, i wish i made more money so i could pay all my bills all the time. im not asking for a Ferrari, or even a new set of tires for my escort, just enough money to pay off my student loans in a reasonable manner.

oh, and i suck at being vegan. i want to be vegan so bad. but i suck at it.

also, i need to buy contacts, but im too cheap to get them, so instead i have to wear my stupid glasses everyday. even when i went to see a 3D movie, which i means i literally had two pairs of glasses on for 2 hours.

that’s right, i saw UP. and it wasn’t even good. all of you people out there saying it was good? you’re wrong. it was predictable, and the 3D stuff wasn’t cool because hardly anything jumped out at you, and the only cute part was the nice talking dog.

also, i’ve had a cold for like the last three months straight and sudfed doesn’t even work and my right ear probably has an infection or something because it’s REALLY bothering me, but im too lame to do anything about it.

and well, really, im just sad because i’m going to a wake tomorrow. and that’s never good.

i love my sister like peanut butter loves strawberry jelly.

Published: June 9, 2009 / Updated: June 10, 2009 Crystal humor, im cool, medium

holy crap. where the frick did the last 10 years go?

i remember wondering what her voice would sound like. and crouching on the floor while she laid on a single couch cushion the week she was born waiting for her to blink because HOLY COW I FINALLY HAD A SISTER!!

and now she’s TEN! I swear to candles that it’s been like a minute since that girl was born.

per tradition in my family, we hosted a sleep over to honor of her big day. and she got to invite a crap load of people, nine of whom showed up.

Yes, that’s 10 girls, in one night.

my theory on hosting that many hot-tempered ten-year-olds can be summed up in two simple words: ORGANIZED ACTIVITY.

we did the tennis-ball-under-the-chin relay, egg toss, sardines (the game, not the food), a taco bar (the food, not the game), gray wolf, cake, presents, glow-in-the-dark hot potato, pass the story and then ended it all with with sleeping bags pointed toward a showing of “Adventures in babysitting.” (the movie).

i’d like to think the point where one of the guests turned to my sister and said “I’M HAVING A REALLY FUN TIME” solidified the fact that i rock at hosting little-girl tween parties.

i only hope her 20th birthday is half as fun, and her next 10 years are half as awesome.

i love you sis. for real.