The only certainty is bad grammar

WARNING: This post may not be suitable for those who think I’m perfect.

So what kind of evil genius said ‘oh, let me just go ahead and mix this alcohol (which relaxes me) with this here energy drink (which, as the name implies, gives me engery) and see what happens’?

seriously. WHO DID THIS?

and why did that REALLY cute guy last night have to go and buy me one?

huh?

does he WANT me to party like it’s 1999 for the WHOLE millennium?

because I could now.

i really could.

for those of you a few years behind the latest drinking trends (hi mom!) here’s a brief description (according to the infallible wikipedia)

The Jägerbomb, or occasionally Jagbomb is a cocktail combining one shot of Jägermeister dropped into a glass of an energy drink, usually Red Bull.[1][2] It is referred to as a “Jäger-Bull” in some English bars.

Jägerbomb – Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia.

it’s crazy.

seriously.

(and kinda expnsive).

but it’s also FUN.

at this point, you might be all, ‘well, I’ve had rum and coke, and coke has caffeine, so it’s probably the same thing.’

ahh, young grasshopper, you’re so naive.

because THESE are more like meth mixed with tylenol pm.

with a soothing cherry flavor.

seriously.

that’s what they’re like.

and all im going to say about last night is that i did not get home until 5 a.m.

and i danced a lot.

go ahead and fill in the rest of the blanks for yourself if you’re in to that sort of thing.

and for the record: Im obviously over 21, so stop judging me.

stop it.

and hand me some water, will you. im super hung over. dehydrated.

WARNING: This post may not be suitable for those who think I’m perfect.

So what kind of evil genius said ‘oh, let me just go ahead and mix this alcohol (which relaxes me) with this here energy drink (which, as the name implies, gives me engery) and see what happens’?

seriously. WHO DID THIS?

and why did that REALLY cute guy last night have to go and buy me one?

huh?

does he WANT me to party like it’s 1999 for the WHOLE millennium?

because I could now.

i really could.

for those of you a few years behind the latest drinking trends (hi mom!) here’s a brief description (according to the infallible wikipedia)

The Jägerbomb, or occasionally Jagbomb is a cocktail combining one shot of Jägermeister dropped into a glass of an energy drink, usually Red Bull.[1][2] It is referred to as a “Jäger-Bull” in some English bars.

Jägerbomb – Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia.

it’s crazy.

seriously.

(and kinda expnsive).

but it’s also FUN.

at this point, you might be all, ‘well, I’ve had rum and coke, and coke has caffeine, so it’s probably the same thing.’

ahh, young grasshopper, you’re so naive.

because THESE are more like meth mixed with tylenol pm.

with a soothing cherry flavor.

seriously.

that’s what they’re like.

and all im going to say about last night is that i did not get home until 5 a.m.

and i danced a lot.

go ahead and fill in the rest of the blanks for yourself if you’re in to that sort of thing.

and for the record: Im obviously over 21, so stop judging me.

stop it.

and hand me some water, will you. im super hung over. dehydrated.