naps and coke are my favorite / I need a second job

Crap. Am I allowed to write about stupid crap yet on my blog or are we all still focused on Haiti?

Because I’m all about helping the Haitians. But my life is currently filled with stupid crap.

You guys won’t be all, “Crystal, how about you just be happy you have food at all and stop complaining out your stupid love affair with soda?” will you?

Speaking of. Coke is so delicious.

Soda. Pop. Brown stuff.

It’s de.freaking.liciousness in liquid form mixed with sprinkles of happiness.

I’ve been avoiding cokes lately seeing as how they’re basically dripping with calories and sugar and extra inches on my waist. But I had one with lunch today because I was as tired as a two-year old after a day at the zoo and I didn’t want to be a party popper for my amazing friends Tom and Sarah. (Hi Tom! Hi Sarah!).

I only drank about 75 percent of it, but it was just the right amount to wake me up without giving me the shakes. I don’t think I’m addicted the way I used to be. I think I’m finally at a point where I can have just one, or none at all and be cool with my meal. It’s a place that’s taken me 11 years to find.

But today. Man, that 75 percent of a glass of coke was awesome.

And then! When I crashed from the sugar of it all, I took a nap.

Remember naps? They’re best taken on Sunday afternoon after or during some sort of football game.

When I woke up from my hour of slumber I could see the world clearly again.

There it was. My life. In focus.

Or at least closer to focus.

Speaking of life. I need to get a second job.

And I by “need,” I mean “I’m not planning to pay my January car payment until I get a second job and then get paid by that job” need.

My schedule at the paper (where I get my health insurance from) is about as random as an iPod shuffle, so I have to find something that fits. A friend suggested early morning hours, like 5 a.m. to 9 a.m., which I figure would cut my current six hours of sleep a night to four.

I could totally function on four hours of sleep right?

Or tutoring. Does anyone know where I can get a job tutoring? I have a master’s degree! How much does that even pay?

I used to have big plans of working at Hooters a sports bar,  calculating exactly where I’d like my body to be for just such a position, but then God found out and made me sprain my ankle, so toning up hasn’t really happened so much and now I’m thinking that’s not in the cards.

Anyway, suggestions on how to make (legal) extra money are currently welcome. And don’t worry, I know the world currently is filled with hopelessness and unemployment and horrible, horrible things in Haiti. And I am happy to have a job at all.

Mostly happy anyway.

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  1. I always made pretty good money through babysitting. You could do a daily “getting the kids up/fed/on the bus” routine, or do random weekend jobs or date nights for couples. Let the children’s ministry coordinator and a few nice couples with kids know that you are looking to babysit & to pass your name on if anyone needs a babysitter, and you’ll probably be getting lots of referrals in no time.

    You can do self-marketing for tutoring jobs the same way, or most colleges have writing centers where they do tutoring for writing papers.

    And 5am-9am is a common shift at many coffee houses, bagel shops, and Panera’s I bellieve. And didn’t you say you would go to jazzercise at 5am (before you sprained your ankle)? I bet gyms open around that time too.

    Good luck! (Job hunting is never really fun I think)

  2. Become a dog walker. Seriously. We have one in our building. She has a master’s degree and traded in her real job to be a full time dog walker. She hangs little signs and has a website and a FB page. And then you can walk and work at the same time. Weight loss goal and money all in one.

  3. LOL i have never actually been inside a hooters but i don’t think it’s very veg-friendly. Oh, soda IS actually really good. I forgot how good it is haha. I’m going to learn to make my own soda. been reading about it, maybe i can use stevia or something so it’s not so caloric. OH! If i succeed i will FedEx it to you. haha

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