maybe a real drug addiction would help

so there i am enjoying my happy little life in my new AMAZING apartment yesterday, when i start getting depressed. 

and i can’t put my finger on why, except to say that i feel like i actually MISS my long-a$$ commute, and i wish i was more tired. and that maybe i should try to apply for a wal-mart manager job because heck ya, im a people person. 

i grab my favorite weakness (a coke) and almost put the effort into crying. 

but then, my friend the writer calls and after i sigh about 16 times he’s all, “omg, you’re addicted to stress.” 

except he didn’t actually say “omg,” because he would NEVER talk like that in a million years. 

he’s a writer people. 

anyway, i realize that i am, in fact, crazy. 

and i only feel like a valid person when im exhausted.

and that’s why (close your eyes mom) i like being hungover on saturday’s some time. not ALL the time. im not a d*mn alcoholic people. i just like feeling validated for sleeping all day. and a hangover kinda forces that on you.

and after i discovered my addiction, i took a hot bath. 

because i was so stressed out about it. 

wait. 

FRICK. 

i need help.

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new life goal no. 4,583

so the other day one i was talking to my friends from back in the day about how I need to set a new goal, because i’ve already accomplished my last goal of finding a job in the chicagoland area. 

and he said ‘you should set a goal to make a million dollars, because you always accomplish your goals, and then you’ll be rich’

mind you, this was a boy i used to want to date, and at one point in my life my goal was to marry him. you can tell by my currently single status how well that worked out. 

but also, the reason i accomplish most of my goals is that they tend to be fairly realistic. 

‘go to college’ check

‘get a job after college’ check

‘get a different job that i actually like because i hate being a copy editor’ check

etc. etc. 

nevertheless i’ve been pondering my new life goal choices lately, and after some discussion with my friend “the writer,” i’ve decided (at his urging) that i really, really want to write a book. 

and i believe that when we say our goals out loud enough times we eventually reach them. 

and i’ve told a few other people that this is my new goal, and they have all looked at me like a crazy person. 

but those are the same people who thought i could never make a living as a journalist. and NO, i don’t make a very good living as a journalist. but i manage to pay most of my bills every month. and im fairly convinced that those are the same people who don’t accomplish many of their own goals because they don’t think random things like writing a book are possible.

im going go ahead to do my best to ignore those folk. 

and if you’ll know of someone who wants me to write a book filled with lower case i’s, let me know because i am SO their girl.

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smells like teen spirit

so i spent most of yesterday, chilling in the newly delivered autumn weather thinking about how awesome life it. 

and let me just say thank GAWD it was in the 60s. 

see, what happened was, i got ready in my new bathroom (see post below) and i kinda, sorta forget some steps. (the new environment discombobulated me). i couldn’t put my finger on what though. 

then, around 8 p.m. my new roommate didn’t want to share the couch with me. 

and i was all ‘man, that’s weird.’

until i went to bed and pulled off my shirt. 

ahhh. i forgot deodorant.

that’s sucks.

im hoping i just kept my arms down most of the day and nobody really noticed.

🙁

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