seriously, starting over sucks no matter how it goes down

August 3, 2008 Crystal humor, short

here’s my confession.

when i was younger i wanted attention. ha. ha. ha. ha.

oh. wait.

THAT’s not my confession. that’s HER confession.

MY confession is:

i dont REALLY like doing EVERYTHING alone.

ya. i pretend that I LOVE going to the movies solo. and that shopping by myself is WAY better. and that i LIKE the quiet i get when i eat alone at chipotle.

but it’s basically all lies.

true story.

so, even though i’ve started a new job like 34 times in the past month, it’s still hard to move and make new friends.

don’t get me wrong, i heart my new employer. it just sucks trying to hang out with the janitor out of desperation.

really. sucks. 

im sitting here alone on a sunday afternoon. blogging. while pretty woman plays on TNT. 

can we say ‘los-er?’

the thing is, i had JUST started making good friends in oshkosh b’gosh when i decided to pack up and move again.

so this is all basically my fault.

(sorta).

just so you know that i do have every intention of fixing this, my new life plan includes becoming very, very, very rich. buying an island. and making all my friends come live with me on it.

actually. screw that.

i really just need one person (if he’s the right person.)

everyone else can visit at their discretion.

bottom line: i want my life to be like a kenny chesney video, or at least a cool pepsi ad.

that’s pretty realistic. right?

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don’t judge me (i’ll do that myself, thank you)

August 2, 2008 Crystal anti-meat, humor, im cool, medium

ok. ok. i ate some d*mn cheese today.

what? this doesn’t make me a bad person. (right?)

see, what happened was. well. im just SO tired.

seriously.

i even have proof from a doctor.

(and by “proof” i mean “no proof.” but whatever).

here’s the thing, im commuting like INSANE amounts and im not sleeping that much, and i basically leave for work at like 8:30 a.m. and then i don’t get home until 10 p.m. and then i fall onto the bed and sleep and wake up and go back to work. AND im just not eating very much. there’s no time. and i can’t realistically bring a breakfast, lunch, dinner and snack with me to work every day.

AND im getting so exhausted that when i drive at night all the lights blur to the point that i can’t see anything else. and my eye doctor told me (for $25) that i probably just need more sleep because my eyes are so fatigue that they can’t focus.

and i know im not tired JUST because im vegan (was vegan?), but it’s not helping.

and then today, i went to Whole Foods, which is supposed to be like a vegan utopia, and even THEIR salad bar had hardly anything for me to eat.

so i took some mac&cheese and officially decided to take a little break from veganism.

don’t worry, im still vegetarian. and i still want to eat mostly vegan food.

i just need to make sure im getting enough to eat on a regular basis. and i can’t do that as a vegan right now.

it is looking like i will be moving in with a friend closer to my job within the next month or so, so maybe I’ll pick it up again. or maybe not. im not sure.

but for the record, i totally made it 5 and a half months without dairy.

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don’t judge me (i’ll do that myself, thank you)

August 2, 2008 Crystal anti-meat, humor, im cool, medium

ok. ok. i ate some d*mn cheese today.

what? this doesn’t make me a bad person. (right?)

see, what happened was. well. im just SO tired.

seriously.

i even have proof from a doctor.

(and by “proof” i mean “no proof.” but whatever).

here’s the thing, im commuting like INSANE amounts and im not sleeping that much, and i basically leave for work at like 8:30 a.m. and then i don’t get home until 10 p.m. and then i fall onto the bed and sleep and wake up and go back to work. AND im just not eating very much. there’s no time. and i can’t realistically bring a breakfast, lunch, dinner and snack with me to work every day.

AND im getting so exhausted that when i drive at night all the lights blur to the point that i can’t see anything else. and my eye doctor told me (for $25) that i probably just need more sleep because my eyes are so fatigue that they can’t focus.

and i know im not tired JUST because im vegan (was vegan?), but it’s not helping.

and then today, i went to Whole Foods, which is supposed to be like a vegan utopia, and even THEIR salad bar had hardly anything for me to eat.

so i took some mac&cheese and officially decided to take a little break from veganism.

don’t worry, im still vegetarian. and i still want to eat mostly vegan food.

i just need to make sure im getting enough to eat on a regular basis. and i can’t do that as a vegan right now.

it is looking like i will be moving in with a friend closer to my job within the next month or so, so maybe I’ll pick it up again. or maybe not. im not sure.

but for the record, i totally made it 5 and a half months without dairy.

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