Cherry pie FAIL

see. jayne from the church youth group would have seen this travesty coming from a mile way. when were gathered to make pies as part of the mission trip fundraiser Saturday, she kept insisting that I was going around screwing everything up. telling everyone i can’t property roll dough, rip wax paper or open a can of cherries, and saying things like “way to be crystal. way to be.”

whatever fine. yes. i put holes in the dough, yes. i tore the wax paper and yes. i kind of dropped the tin lid into the cherries.

but alas, i was in denial.

so i tried to take the recipe we used for the fundraiser (provided by the lovely Renee, who goes to our church and makes pie crust like a pastry angle) and bake a cherry pie for my mom last night.

except i suck at making pie crust.

i swear to the oven gods that i used the EXACT recipe i was given. i mixed the oil, flour, salt and cold water EXACTLY as i was told to. and WAM! i get a half-covered pie that has an overbearing wheat flour flavor

i just don’t understand it. i helped roll out 30 crusts Saturday.

THIRTY CRUSTS.  what the heck? how did this happen?

i was planning to make a movie-ready pie and then share the specifics with ya’ll, but seeing as how it turned out like a, well, just look at the picture, i think it would be better for all involved if i wait to figure out what went wrong and report back.

for those you who have your own pie crust recipes though and are aching to make a vegan cherry concoction, i WILL tell you that it’s just two cans of cherry pie filling mixed with cinnamon. that’s it. this is one of those awesome baking recipes that’s already vegan and doesn’t have to be tweaked.

and yes, the filling is delicious.

but even that didn’t make me feel better about this whole thing. i mean, it was basically PRE-MADE! just heat. spice and serve.

thankfully, my mom loves me so much that she barely even noticed how much i had screwed up, and even cleaned her plate when i gave her a piece.

and that right there folks. well that’s how i know my mother loves me for me.

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Comments (2)

  1. Sandy

    Crystal,
    It looks like a Cherry Cobler which is the best. Just don’t mention that the top is flour, etc. If people think it is sugar crumble, it will pass. Can’t learn anything until you try and fail first. I think that is a rule or something.

    Reply
  2. SCVegan

    Oh, you need to take that picture and make a Christmas card out of it somehow.

    Reply

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