Bein vegan is hard and because I just don’t want to bring a lunch to work every freaking day of my life, sometimes i like to get fast food.
except the only place i can get anything besides french fries and a coke is Taco Bell.
i usually go with the seven-layer burrito minus the cheese and sour cream.
and yesterday i said into the speaker:
CAN I GET A SEVEN-LAYER BURRITO WITH NO CHEESE AND NO SOUR CREAM?!
and the lady was all:
DO YOU WANT THE GUACAMOLE THEN?
and then i was all:
umm. whhhhhhhy? does that have sour cream in it?
sh*t. thanks for ruining my life.
NO GUACAMOLE THEN EITHER. THANKS.
ANY HOT, FIRE OR MILD SAUCE?
and then i pulled around to the window with a tear in my eye.
and no, i’m NOT mad that i’ve been eating the stupid guacamolesourcream for months without knowing its secret life — i’ve already accepted the fact that it’s impossible to be a perfect vegan — but i AM sad that my seven-layer burrito just officially became a four-layer burrito.
sigh. bein vegan is hard.