snow – Page 3 – The only certainty is bad grammar

my two scents

February 27, 2008 Crystal short, snow sucks

ok. ok. i’ve been complaining about the weather foreva! and it’s finally warming up (and by warming up i mean 27 degrees) so i should be happy.

BUT there’s a little byproduct of the hotter temperatures — my car kind of smells. and i KNEW that not cleaning the outside for the past 17 months would result in a permant layer of gray salt, but i forgot that not cleaning the INSIDE would result in hidden smells.

and the cold temperatures apparently fooled me into thinking that all the garbage in my car was fragrance-free. ahhh. but it’s not. it’s so not. and i NEED to clean it out. but now it’s that weird time of year when it’s warm enough to make old food smell, but cold enough that i don’t want to take the time to futz around in my little green escourt (with many hard-to-reach sections) looking for whatever is causing the problem.

and i know all you people are going to think im gross now. but I swear im not. im just adverse to the cold. really. swear. as soon as oshkosh sees a 40 35-degree day, i’ll dig around and find out the root all smells. swear.

Reason #167 for hating winter:

February 24, 2008 Crystal short, snow sucks

My heat bill was $190. PEOPLE!! $190??!! to heat a SMALL apartment. for ONE month! what the crap? That’s more than my car payment. and it’s more than my car insurance payment. and almost half my freaking rent.

As a result, my apartment will now be 54 degrees (ish) for the rest of the winter. if you were planning to visit i’d recommend you bring an extra sweater. or a blanket. or summer.

she totally would call me her bff now.

February 19, 2008 Crystal long

yesterday, there i was sitting at home like a loser who hates showers watching Deadwood epidoes on DVD when an unknown number popped up on my cell. and i’m not going to lie, i didn’t answer it. but then, it came up again and i thought ‘well, if it’s that dentist in South Dakota calling me on a Sunday to remind me i still owe her $130 for a filling, i can always just hang up.’ but it wasn’t that dentist. it was Hillary Clinton’s campaign.

holy crap!

after the usual pleasantries (i.e. them: sorry i didn’t get back to you yesterday, we were really busy, me: that’s ok) the press person said ‘I’m going to have some time with the senator in about an hour if you’d like to do a one-on-one phone interview with her.

PEOPLE!!! DID YOU JUST READ WHAT I WROTE??!! A ONE-ON-ONE WITH HILLARY CLINTON!

don’t worry, I played it cool — i was all ‘ya, i think i can do that.’

then. i immediately started taking off my pj’s and putting on regular clothes. rushed around looking for my broken glasses, used some deodorant and even brushed my teeth so i could go to work. that took about three, maybe four seconds.

i grabbed all my stuff and ran through a quarter-mile of foot-high snow to get to my car. (did i mention the winter storm we had yesterday). alas, when i got to my car, i realized there was about a foot of snow that needed to be scraped off and UNDER THAT there was an inch of solid ice that needed to be scraped through. an inch. and my razor-sharp (i use the term loosely) scrapper just wasn’t in the mood for it. so i only scrapped off an 2-inch by 2-inch section on the passenger side. let’s just say, that was a stupid idea.

the whole ride to work (through the blizzard) i was basically just praying that tomorrow’s paper didn’t read ‘REPORTER DIES TRYING TO INTERVIEW CLINTON’ while i gripped the steering wheel with both hands. thankfully, i made it ok.

I got to work in time for the arranged interview and then — it was delayed. which was cool, because that gave me an additional 30 minutes to be nervous.

When i finally got her on the phone, i was all ‘why is wisconsin important’ and she was all ‘i heart wisconsin.’ (or something like that) and we talked for 15 minutes. THAT’S RIGHT, I TALKED ONE-ON-ONE WITH HILLARY CLINTON FOR 15 MINUTES and then, i wrote this article.

and that’s the story of how hillary and i became bff. just in case you were wondering.